Last night the Little slept from 8:00 p.m. to 6:45 a.m. I’m sure he would have slept a little longer but I checked on him at 6:30 because I was fearing the worst and he started stirring not too shortly after. For months I had imagined my baby sleeping through the night but the journey here was tough.
The last time I slept this much was the day before my water broke, almost 9 months ago. So many people told me when I was pregnant that sleep would go out the window when the baby was born. I heard them but until you’ve lived through months of crappy 1 -2 hour stretches of sleep, you truly don’t understand.
I consider myself to be a crunchy mama. I breastfeed, cloth diaper, wear my baby and we’re delaying the Little’s vaccinations (the few that we are going to allow) until he’s 2, but months of crappy sleep was making a horrible mother. It was getting bad and I was getting to the point where I thought of physically harming myself . I would pray daily for patience and repeat mantras to help me get through it and to be a decent mother.
Even with these thoughts and emotions, I did not want to do a form of sleep training that would involve him crying. I tried the [amazon_link id="0071381392" target="_blank" container="" container_class="" ]“The No Cry Sleep Solution”[/amazon_link] and it did not work for us.
I was ready to bear it and pray that his sleep habits improved as he got older but then I bumped into another mom who shared that her son was sleeping from 5:30 p.m. – 7:00 a.m. every night. I wanted to pull out an ozzie and mow her down, well, after she told me training method had got her baby sleeping thought the night. I cried when I told my husband this and he finally suggested we look at the books the Little’s doctor recommended: “[amazon_link id="1593155581" target="_blank" container="" container_class="" ]Good Night, Sleep Tight[/amazon_link]” and “[amazon_link id="0757305601" target="_blank" container="" container_class="" ]The Sleep Easy Solution[/amazon_link]“.
I bought both via Kindle and we settled on “[amazon_link id="1593155581" target="_blank" container="" container_class="" ]Good Night, Sleep Tight[/amazon_link]” since it is a gentler approach to cry it out. I don’t care how you pretty it up, your child is going to cry and it will break your heart.
In this sleep training method, you are present to support your child. The first night you sit next to the crib and then over the next 13 days you move your chair closer to the door until you are no longer in the room. The first night was miserable. I felt like I had purposely rammed a spike through my heart and was bleeding out of every orifice. How could I just sit there when the person nearest and dearest to me cried his heart out. I thought of all the reasons why I had to do this and tried to deflect all the reasons I did not want to do cry it out – possible brain damage, distance, etc. When he finally passed out – 2 hours later – I was a wreck but he slept, waking only 3 times that night.
The third night he slept though the night and has continued to do so. I’m working on napping and have started to find ways to get him to sleep with no tears (Thank you Universe!). We’ve discovered that after his bed time routine, if my husband lays him down then he will cry for 3 – 5 minutes before going to sleep.
It’s not pretty what sleep deprivation can do to your mind and it’s only now with thee nights of rest that I can truly see how messed up I was. There are no easy answers when you’re a parent. I’m realizing there are more shades of grey and a lot of the preconceived ideas of how I would like to raise my son went up in smoke the minute he was born.